The Real Problem with Gay Marriage

Posted on 12:07 PM by Mike Fye


I like to think of myself as a moderate in terms of politics. I don't think I really had a choice considering I grew up in the buckle of the Bible Belt, while also being exposed to tons of liberal civil rights issues via my mom's workplace. So I've seen more than my share of extremist views on both sides of the fence, and I like to think I understand the reasoning behind their thinking. But when it comes to gay rights, I'm way over in left field, squinting to make out the faces of my conservative peers. Even if it's something you don't agree with morally, they are still human beings just like the rest of us.

Marriage is one of the few things that separates us from the rest of the animals. Monogamy itself is very rare among all that lives because it goes against the "survive and repopulate" scheme that's got us to where we are today. As humans though, we came to adopt the position that in order to survive, we need to find that one person we can share our thoughts, hopes, defeats and victories with. In order to raise a child successfully, we decided that the Mother and Father should be present to ensure "proper" social integration (which I think is BS for a few reasons, that I hope to rant about in the future). To prevent releasing savage beast-people into our peaceful society.

So. What are the big arguments against Gay Marriage? And how valid are they? Let's look at a few. And once again, this is for entertainment purposes only. I have no idea what the hell I'm talking about in real life.

3. Gay People Can't Reproduce, and if They Do End Up with A Child Somehow It Will Be Evil.

Says who? Well, obviously reproduction is difficult, and the basis for believing that homosexuality is wrong or unnatural (which is ANOTHER issue that deserves further ranting). But there are obviously plenty of alternatives for this now. This goes along with the whole "Homosexuality is a Choice" argument I suppose. But that just makes even less sense. Tons of gay people come from traditional, religious families.  Yet they still "chose" to be gay. So why can't a child from a homosexual couple "choose" to be straight?

 The main point Bible-thumpers keep trying to "bash" (get it?) into our heads is that being gay is a sin, and makes you incapable of having the moral compass to properly raise a kid. OK, fine. Let's run with that. Let's go ahead and pass legislation that says anyone who knowingly commits a sin should be sterilized and turn in any existing children to the state. Or better yet, the Catholic church! The simple fact is, according to the Good Book, EVERYONE sins. And even if you are basing it off the fact that homosexuals are not or can not (B.S.) be Christians, then you need to go after ALL of the non-Christian community. You can't just single out the sins you think are gross. Homosexuals are just as capable of having a moral compass as anyone else. And if it comes to a choice between placing a child in the hands of the government or ANY caring couple that only wants to provide a stable, loving environment, then sign me up for the couple. Every time.

2. People should not have their tax dollars used to support something they believe is wrong. 

Yeah! I agree! We shouldn't have to pay taxes for ANYTHING we don't agree with! Each year, we should all receive a checklist with all the various things our money goes towards. And we can pick and choose what we want to support! The government is always going to do something that someone doesn't agree with somewhere. It's kinda the thing that makes this country so great. We have the ability to believe in whatever we want, and our government (for the most part) is there to help ensure that. I'm pretty anti-war for the most part, but I'm also pro-social programs. In a perfect world, we'd all get whatever we wanted all the time. In the real world, you have to SHARE and make sure everyone gets a turn, ok? If not, we'll all end up in time out and ice-cream coneless.

1. It Will Subvert the Sacred Institution of Marriage!

Here is the dumbest argument of them all. I mean, Scary Movie 5 dumb. Do you know what's REALLY subverted the sacred institution of marriage? Everyone else. Divorce rates have steadily increased year after year. I don't know statistics, but it seems like first-time marriages are considered nothing more than a practice run for people. Christians are just as likely, if not more likely in some cases, to go through divorce as anyone else. So why are we saying gay people will fail at it, or mess it up more, when it's already pretty screwed up to begin with? I think they at least deserve a chance to suck at it as much as the rest of us.

What I think it boils down to, the REAL problem with gay marriage, is we're afraid they're going to make US look bad by doing it better. With them fighting so hard to be able to do something that we basically take for granted, I'd be willing to bet they can.


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